With the reality of life slowly peaking its head into the window of my life (poetic, I know), I have decided to focus the remainder of my time here in Cape Town doing what I do best…. Nothing. Thus, for the past three weeks, I have put forth great effort in order to maximize the amount of “nothing” I pack into each day. This includes, but is not limited to the following:
- Sleeping: I require at least 10 hours each night in order to accomplish the below “non-sleeping” activities. If less than 10 hours is acquired, I am as functional as a dusty Nintendo NES cartridge (score 3 points for the 1980s reference)
- Eating: Not only have I mastered the art of eating (I am really good at it), I have also spent countless hours perfecting the creation of one of the most complex and difficult cuisines in the world: The Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwich (trust me, mine are amazing).
- Sitting: I have also managed to excel in the god-given talent of resting my rear on any given surface (preferably soft and couch-like).
- TV-Watching: Who can watch a rerun of one show 5 times in a week? I can. That’s who.
- Gym: Although visiting the gym goes against the ideals of “nothingness,” I still want to maintain my sexy appeal while perched in front of the TV (Adding a 20 pound weight to the remote unfortunately did not produce the results for which I had hoped).
- Facebook Stalking: Despite being over 8,000 miles away from the majority of my friends and family, I still encompass the ability to stalk each and everyone of them, via the wonderful world of Facebook. Thus, I implore to you all, please update your status, add new photos, and write on my wall. It provides me with much needed amusement that makes each day that much better. (To those of you unfamiliar with Facebook, a singing telegram is fine as well).
- Aimless Staring: As my brain has not been properly tested in the past ten months, due to an overwhelming lack of responsibility and/or any need to think whatsoever, I find myself staring off into the distance quite often. And… well… not much there.
- Drinking: I have actually been doing a bit of soul-searching lately, and have come to the realization that my drinking habits are starting to become an issue, not only to me, but to those around me as well. With the numerous health implications and....... (sorry, must've blacked out)
Furthering my pursuit of “nothingness,” I unfortunately have also parted ways with Thunda.com, relinquishing my duties as a ThundaCat photographer. With six shifts under my belt, and the possibility of spending every remaining Thursday through Saturday night behind my camera, pestering hundreds of people each night for a picture, I decided to call it quits (aka was kinda fired for only wanting to work one shift per week… details details). Even with the pay representing a great resource to cover 0.1% of my rent each month (I think my average hourly wage worked out to be around $2.50/hr), it was not enough to keep me onboard for the remainder of my time here in Cape Town. Thus, to summarize my working experience here in South Africa, I will quote the words of my friend and former roommate Peter Grace: “Only you could work a steady job for the world's super power yet keep losing jobs in the 3rd world.” Well said Grace. Well said.
Hmmmm, what else? The weather unfortunately in and around Cape Town has been quite dismal lately (did I just say dismal?). Although winter here is nothing in comparison to the 6 months of freezing cold & clouds back home, it is still quite depressing going from 7 straight months of endless sunshine and 80 degree days, to rainy days ranging anywhere from 50-60 degrees. And after writing that, I have just realized how spoiled I sound. Please negate this paragraph.
On a more exciting note, I was robbed on Saturday night. After having lived in South Africa for 10 months without one single criminal act thrown upon me, I was unfortunately the victim of a car break-in, whereby numerous items of significant value were stolen from me. Before going further, let me add a glossary to help you understand the situation:
- Car Break-In = Not my car. My friend’s car
- Numerous Items = One item which can serve numerous purposes
- Item = Small camera case whose zipping functions ceased about 2 years ago
- Significant Value = $1-2 (street value)
- Me = Not me. My friends. I was not there. My poor camera case was though…
Thus, I now can no longer say I have been unaffected by the shockingly high crime rate here in South Africa.
Note: I will be accepting donations, and do appreciate your thoughtfulness in helping me get through this difficult time in my life (and yes, I am knocking on wood as I write this paragraph).
And finally, how could I leave out “The Religion Wars?” With my recent acquisition of both a Christian and a Muslim friend, we decided to partake in the ultimate Battle Royale, testing our strength and honor, all in order to determine who represents the strongest religion. Partaking in various “activities” to earn one’s respective religion points, I will give you just an example of some of the fortitude we have displayed, all in the name of religion:
- Buy a round of drinks – 10 Points
- Go talk to that chick over there – 20 Points
- Inappropriate blog-censored behavior – 50 points
- Say something witty/funny – Varies depending on amount of laughter produced
- Embarrass yourself or others – Can result in positive or negative points, depending on circumstances and amount of laughter produced (Ex: Rejection by female = Negative points for rejectee’s religion, positive points for rejector’s religion)
Thus, as you can tell, it has been quite difficult leading the Jewish religion in this battle, although I am trying my best. While my bar-mitzvah unfortunately did not score me any points, other rites of passage which I aspire to perform during my time in South Africa will hopefully bring me to victory. I will have an update for you all by next blog.
Well, somehow I managed to write a blog without having done much of anything. Thus, I leave you to the section which puts my words into pictures…
Onto the pics:
 | Random one-day road trip to Cape Algulhas -- The southern most point of Africa (ok, so I lied... I did do something these past 3 weeks) |
 | Some crashing waves in Hermanus |
 | Windows XP Land |
 | Natural Hot Springs + Commercialization = Unnatural Hot Springs unless you pay $1,000 |
 | I like sitting |
 | Such a skinny pig |
 | My Mom is shaking her head right now... and I am laughing |
 | 5AM + Red Wine + Me = Amazing combo |
 | Partying it up on the 4th of July |
 | USA! USA! USA! |
 | "I just felt like runnnnning" (if this were my last blog, just imagine the symbolism coming from this picture...) |
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